Wednesday, June 18, 2003

Why isn't she writing anything? Anyway, I bet I can totally predict what she is going to write.

*****
I have a good hair day today.

(picture of hair)

How great! A happy day begins with a good hair day!

Eddy msged me today yadda yadda.
*****

Some of you all emailed me to ask me to tell u all what kinda person I really am.

Actually nobody emailed me. Thats coz nobody EVER emails me. I just made up that excuse coz I need someone to listen to me talk about me.

Okie here goes:

Name: Eccentric Eddy Lee

Age: 23

Race: I have no interest in speeding vehicles, thank you. Oh, that race. Eh, chinese lor. If not why the Lee.

Occupation: Engineer

Dick size: 6.5" (Okie fine I am lying.)

Hobbies: Eh I dun really like Calvin and Hobbes. Oh. That hobbies. Eh, Squeezing my pimples? Weather? Politics? Wood working? Being cynical? And wanking looking at Grouchy Gwenne, of course. Who is your favourite Xiaxue friend?

Overall I am an optimist. The cup is always half full. Thats coz when it spills, half full is more to clean up than half empty. And yes, it ALWAYS seem to spill when I use it, dammit. Bad things always happen to me. Every single day.

I am ugly. I am poor. I am bored and boring. Thank goodness I am too dumb to realise I am not very smart. Basically I hate the world.

Anyway, I have decided to use this blog as my own blog as well. My life is very interesting today. I went to work at Shenton way, Afro Asia building, 8 am. I wore a blue top. I made 3 cups of coffee. I did my work till 7 pm. I reached home at 8pm. My mum cooked dinner and I watched porn till now.

No, I didn't wank today. I only wank on Wednesdays. I call it the Wanking Weds. Ain't it great?

The ultimate bad thing that happened to me today is that when I crossed a road, a chicken actually crossed it with me. I was feeling very pissed coz I dun feel like sharing a human road with a filthy chicken. I mean, how often do u see chickens cross the road? I am totally sway.

While the chicken and I were waiting for the lights to turn green, I decided to make small talk to the chicken. U would never know when public relations can make ur life better. It is better to know more contacts, even if it was just a chicken.

I asked the chicken: "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

The chicken stared at me vindictively.

It chuckled (as in chicken chuckle, not laugh): "WTF do u humans keep asking me this? Why dun u answer me this first? Why did the chewing gum cross the road?"

I told her I dun give a damn as to why the chewing gum crossed the road.

She pecked me on my shin and said I am damn self centred to only care about myself.

She answered me why the chewing gum crossed the road although I did not ask:

"Coz it is stuck to the chicken's feet! And thats why I am crossing the road! To try to scrap it off!"

I told her "You can just ask me for help, bird brain!"

She told me chickens have their dignity too, and crossed the road without me, with her tail feathers high up in the air. She gave me a last cocky face and *splat* went the chicken. It got knocked down by a SBS bus number 42! Its lungs sprayed all over my new montagut shirt. How wonderful.

I am a very unlucky man.


2 Comments:

At 12:59 AM, Blogger *`Simple Is Beautiful~* said...

youre not unlucky. you're just very stupid. if i wanted ot hate xiaxue, i'd really wanna go to a better blog than THIS. honestly. you're full of crap.

 
At 4:35 PM, Blogger Revie Hapsari said...


I really appreciate the positive lift I get from your blog. Have a blessed and grace-full day! Harga SmartFren Andromax

 

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