Friday, June 20, 2003

I didn't write anything yesterday and the day before coz I was utimately unlucky again.

Anyway, my life was very interesting yesterday. I went to work at Shenton way, Afro Asia building, 8 am. I wore a blue top. I made 3 cups of coffee. I did my work till 7 pm. I reached home at 8pm. My mum cooked dinner and I watched porn till now.

The ultimate bad thing that happened to me yesterday was that when I crossed a road, a donkey actually crossed it with me. I was feeling very pissed coz I dun feel like sharing a human road with a filthy donkey. I mean, how often do u see donkeys cross the road? I am totally sway.

I decided I shall not start conversations with the donkey coz it looked very horny. In fact, it was shagging a nearby fire extinguisher very violently indeed.

I thought the fire extinguisher burst and itz contents sprayed all over, but actually it was the donkey. How disgusting. I tried to ignore the phenomenon. I dun think u all believe me at all. I shall borrow Xiaxue's camera if possible, and take pictures to let u all see.

But I refuse to hold anything pink. I am a man you know. How can I hold a silly pink camera?

Anyway, the lights turned green, so I proceeded to walk across the road. The donkey hurried and caught up with me. Halfway across the road, the donkey tapped me on the shoulder and asked: "Why do u humans keep fucking me? I am of a different species u know!"

I told him we didn't do that.

Donkey: "Yes u all do. Someone told me that this trend is caused by a certain blog. Snow or something. It is in Chinese. You know donkeys cannot pronounce chinese. I'm an English donkey ya know? Oh yeah have u watched the Hulk yet? dun watch it! It is a sucky show!"

I asked him: "Why are u such an ass?"

He replied: "Thats my cousin. Oh yeah btw speaking of asses. Now whenever I see humans I feel horny. Just now I shagged the fire extinguisher while thinking of ur ass!"

I was so thoroughly appalled that I accidentally stepped on my shoelace and fell down. I scraped my knee.

This fella who drove pass immediately took me to the hospital while I moaned in agony! I know it is just an abrasion, but forgive me, I'm an engineer! Engineers are wimps when it comes to pain!

So there in the hospital I insisted I will stay till the abrasion totally healed. And thats why I didn't have time to spoof Xiaxue. Coz I was in hospital. Ain't i pitiful? AND WHOSE FAULT IS IT THAT THE DONKEY STARTED TALKING TO ME IN THE FIRST PLACE?!

My colleagues totally did not come and see me! Instead, they went to loyally read Xiaxue's blog and leave good comments as usual. Sycrus and Jo, u can be as sure as ur fat asses that I will put poison into ur coffee when I come back! You traitors! Dun u all remember how Dilly died?!

One more thing. Did u all go tell Xiaxue that my Chinese name is Shui Xiang?!!! HOW DID SHE KNOW THEN! She teased me! Thousands of ppl now will laugh at my name!

I am so pissed.

Lotsa love,
Eccentric Eddy Lee Shui Xiang.

1 Comments:

At 7:12 AM, Blogger snips &/- scissors; jolene said...

mmmmmmmm i like your blog a lot. :D im not exactly against xiaxue but except maybe i don't really like her english and maybe im also jealous of the fact that so many people read her blog but it must be hard work to get everyone to even know about her blog so she's considered quite nice to manage to be so determined. and i was just wondering why this blog was also under xiaxue's account? 0.0

 

Post a Comment

<< Home